I am about to spend a weekend with a dear friend, someone I’ve been inspired by, shared many important moments, learned a lot from and felt tremendous trust in. This will be time spent before she departs on a long journey; a new adventure for her, a new chapter or I’m thinking… A new book all in itself. This is so exciting and I know I will enjoy living vicariously; she is family to me and a beautiful woman blossoming!
Some say that your experiences and decisions in life can either make you or break you. I’ve found that most often, what breaks you IS what makes you. We’ve all hit low points in life – also sometimes referred to as ruts, funks, broken hearts, life crisis,” etc. We all go through these periods where we feel lost and unsure of who we are, where we’re supposed to be, and what we’re supposed to be doing. However, it’s these low points that allow us to rebuild our lives, discover ourselves, and become what we’ve always wanted to be. Below are some thoughts that I have gathered over the years, witnessing and being a part of many people’s big transitions in their lives.
Accept yourself above all else. Resolve to make peace with who you are so that you can start showing up for the world. When we’re constantly overwhelmed by our insecurities, the light of our authentic self does not shine; and it’s that light that draws in every person, experience, and opportunity that aligns with our true happiness.
Perfect is not real. Nothing’s perfect. Nobody is. Flawless doesn’t exist and it’s not even attractive. Someone trying to be perfect is hard to get close to because it’s not realistic. So, just relax. Everything we consider a flaw about ourselves someone else might find endearing. Just get real and let that lead the way.
Immerse yourself in solitude. This is perhaps the most difficult part of this process, but you must embrace the “alone-ness”.
You can’t rely on anyone else to guide you in the right direction. This is a solo mission. Doing it alone is the whole point of the journey. This doesn’t mean you have to cut yourself off from the world, but spending some quality alone time here and there will be very beneficial. Learn to listen to yourself. Learn to trust yourself. Learn to love yourself. It’s when you start to become truly content with who you are as a person that you will discover things about yourself that you never knew before. Be your own best friend.
Go somewhere new. Perhaps the reason you haven’t been able to find yourself yet, is because you aren’t looking in the right places?
Traveling and experiencing different cultures and people are all helpful ways of rediscovering your purpose. It’s good to try new things, and in doing so, you may change your entire life. Think The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. The film may have been mediocre, but it had an inspiring message about the importance of breaking out of your shell and taking risks. No, you don’t have to break the bank and splurge on a plane ticket to Iceland if you don’t want to.
Even just driving a few hours to a nearby city you’ve never been to before could open up your eyes to a whole new world and a whole new you.
Learn to appreciate the little things. When you’re feeling down in the dumps, it’s easy to focus on all of the negative things happening in your life.
Absolutely nothing good will come out of this. No matter how lost, sad, or miserable you may be feeling, there is always something to be grateful for. Maybe it’s that a stranger smiled at you while you were walking down the street. Maybe you managed to fix that leaky faucet all by yourself. Maybe your favorite song came on the radio while you were driving home from work. Shifting your focus from the negatives to the positives is one of the most important things you can do when on a journey to self-discovery. When you begin to connect the dots between all of the little things you have to be grateful for, your life will seem fuller and more satisfying.
Why you want this in the first place. Ultimately you’re trying to improve your life, you want more zest, more flavor, more fullness. In the strictest sense you want to become a better person. You want to wake up in the morning excited, jumping out of bed with a thirst for life that you haven’t felt since you were a child.
Your purpose can be the driving force of this. Your purpose can be your connection to something larger, something that will allow you to make your mark on the world, to truly make a difference. Still, your WHY might be different. Before we even leave solid ground you need this as your anchor, just in case things get a little foggy. To find it just answer this question:
“Why do you want to find your purpose in life?”
Write down or remember whatever comes up. It might be some of the above reasons or it might be something entirely different. Whatever it is cherish it, nothing is too far left field
To my darling friend, I wish you much joy on your journey; I wish you peace and many, many laughs
~ Bon Voyage!
*** If you are curious to learn more about how to Find Your Life’s Purpose, contact me to learn more about a new exciting program starting this fall.